Are You Kidding Me?

Okay,
First let me preface this little diatribe by saying: "I love my daughters dearly and I will support them in whatever venture they choose." There, now that the disclaimer is out of the way.

I have sat in pouring rain and sleet watching a 4 year old kick a soccer ball. I have watched a Tball game during a Tornado Warning. I have sat in a 75 degree, 100 percent humidity pool area watching a 6 year old swim. I have been in 50 degree water swimming at the sand bar with my girls. I have sat in the bleachers in a 90 degree auditorium, inside a hen house, watching my girls do gymnastics. I sat through Kindergarten talent shows and spent hours baiting hooks in hot sun, or pouring rain. I have even walked dogs in -10 degree temperatures with 20mph winds. But nothing, I mean nothing except a day with Del Griffith could have prepared me for this.

When Danielle said that Nicole was taking Tap dance and Ballet, I figured...What the heck. Nothing wrong with 10 weeks or so of Saturday morning practices. Learn some fundamentals, away we go. Boy was I wrong. So apparently, these dance places have this thingy called "A Recital." Now this event is not just for Nicole's class, like you would hope. No, in fact, it is for the entire dance school. This school ranges in all ages and the recital has to take place in a large Auditorium (Dakota High School if you are familiar with the facility).

First off, you have to buy costumes....okay, I can live with that....Then you have to buy tickets. Wait a minute, I paid for all the classes, why do I have to pay again to watch the results? Hmmm. Thirdly, you cannot bring cameras..you can buy the DVD!! Fourth, don't forget this one; you should buy some flowers to give your daughter because of the great performance. Are you kidding me? So it becomes very clear that this entire charade is a money grab. Oh yeah, I forgot the photos you should have taken, in both outfits ;> Amazing. My friend Darren has a 13 year old that has been doing this for 7 years. His reference to dance is simply, "It is all about you and your wallet." Great.

Anyway, I finally got my head around the financial part. Don't really like it, but it is part of the game. Besides, nothing is too good for my kids. So Friday night at 6:40pm Natalie and I arrive at the Auditorium to watch the recital. (Danielle and Nicole are there already - more on that later). Show starts at 7pm sharp. Dances are relatively short, about 1-3 minutes each routine. Some are really good, others are just beginners. The entire gamut is represented. At first, I was intrigued by the abilities. Then as time wore on; 45 minutes into the program and no Nicole yet, I grew weary. Natalie was trying to follow the program (keeping her busy) and discovered that Nicole's 1st act would be on next. Here we go! Might I say, she was awesome and the best little tapper out there. Well worth the wait....Great job baby. I was very proud.

Okay that one is over in 45 seconds. What comes next? Another 25 minutes of show then......wait for it.....10 minute intermission when we start Act II. What? I have been here 1.5 hours already! Act II? Yes, Act II. Oye. So it is written.....So let it be done.

Act II is more of the same. People yelling "Go Girls!" , "Yeah Madison!" , "Woooohooo!" and all of these other sayings that I was quite unprepared for. I thought clapping was sufficient. What do I know. Well another 40 minutes passed and here comes Nicole's second number. Now I may not be "Father of the Year" all the time, but is it bad when you can't pick your kid out on the stage. Hair pulled up tight, makeup looking a bit like the Joker (Cesar Romero not the cheap imitations). Anyway, Natalie finally found her and we watched her perform flawlessly. Again, I was very proud. So that 45 seconds ended and we look at the program. Another 2 pages of songs until the finale'. Again.....ARE YOU KIDDING ME!!!!? (AYKM) Natalie, Mom, Dad and I decided enough was enough. I sent Danielle a text and away we went.

So at home we waited diligently for Danielle and Nicole to come home. Apparently the show ended around 10:15 (OVER 3 HOURS!) and they arrived right around 11pm. AYKM!!!! I am amazed. People do this regularly and look forward to these events. I don't think Nicole will do it again. That is up to her, but man-o-man; To me, that was ridiculous.

Now let me give Kudos and credit to the woman that I love dearly; and sometimes like to tease about her volunteering. My wife deserves parent of the decade for not only getting Nicole ready and organized, but she also was charged with managing the entire class backstage. How do you keep 15 5-7 year olds busy for that long of time and not destroying their dresses, hair or makeup. I don't know how she does it, but if it was me....I would have bailed after Act I. She has a host of stories that all took place during that 3 hour tour. I have no idea how she does it. She is a very strong woman who loves her children!! Great Job Babe!!!!

So that is all I have, I know it is quite lengthy and words do not adequately describe the event. Until you experience it, you will have to trust me. Just know this: It was 50 degrees and drizzling rain at 6:45am this morning. I happily took Roxy for a 2 mile walk. I can smile as I do this because: "I spent the day with Del Griffith!!!"

Thanks, you've been great!

TTS